I am blessed with several friends and colleagues from all over the world who have done a fantastic job of learning English to an impressive level. They are all examples of how taking lessons and/or working and immersing yourself in the English language can result in rapid learning to a high level in a fairly short amount of time.

However, many of these fabulous people can remember occasions in the learning process where they made one or two funny errors. I think it is important to keep learning English fun and light-hearted so that we are not afraid to make mistakes. Some of the mistakes people have made, especially the embarrassing ones, have certainly made sure they will never forget that certain English verb or phrase again!

So I have decided to put together a list of seven real stories of funny English mistakes. I have promised to keep this anonymous so no names are mentioned. Feel free to comment and post your own experiences below.

1. “In the USA I told my host father that he was very handsome (I thought that handsome means nice). He was a bit shocked and confused ;)”

2. “I recently overheard these while on holiday in Greece: ‘it's a funny face to see what you are doing’ - in Dutch we say that when we see someone do something that is really funny, but the other isn't aware of it. And ‘it's not going’- the person saying this meant: 'it's not possible'. It's a direct translation from German.”

3. “In my case it happened to me with the word "constipation"...as in Spanish to be "constipado" (which sounds quite similar) really means to "have a cold"...so it sounds funny and ridiculous when in English you say "I´m constipated" when you mean to say "I have a cold :)”

4. “At the time I was travelling with two girlfriends of mine from Germany and one night we all went out to the beach to party. One of my friends met a guy there and he was really pestering her. Anyway the next morning we were talking about last night’s events and I explained to my other friend that this guy was penetrating her really hard. All the girls shook their heads vehemently and the friend just thought to himself what a bunch of freaks we were. Eventually it became clear that 'penetrating someone really hard' didn't mean being on someone's case. I just assumed the German word 'penetrant' would mean the same once pronounced in an English way!”

5. “When I first stayed in England in '96, I said to my host mum "Do we have to wait until the water cooks?" which cracked her up and I didn't quite understand why - then she said, giggling: "it doesn't cook, it bo-i-ls" (in the most beautiful British accent by the way; I think it was my host family back then that first made me fall in love with England!).”

6. “I remember a friend in Brighton telling me she used to wonder for a good few months why people say "cheese" to the bus drivers as they leave the bus.”

7. “I have made too many goofs to remember! Let's see; the subtle yet vitally important difference between 'cracking up' and 'cracking down'; British vs American use of the word 'fag'; the Americans getting embarrassed when you pronounce 'can't' the British way....